Saturday, January 14, 2012

Telemarketers - No is a complete sentence!

I love Oprah for teaching the 'No' lesson.  I just need to remember to use it more often.


Had a telemarketer call the other day and it went something like this:

T: Hi, I'm calling you back because the last time we spoke you said 'sometime next year' would be a good time to check back with you-- (it's the 10th of the new year already--slacker)--

ME:  Regarding?

T: [blah blah blah] installation of windows [blah blah blah] ........I'm waiting for a break and finally interrupt him --

ME:  --We're not interested.

T:  Really?  Because the last time we spoke, you said you were interested in replacing your windows sometime next year [blah blah blah.......I'm gazing out into the newly fallen snow and imagining all 26 of my windows removed, and a minus 5 windchill blowing through my kitchen] and then I snap out of that fantasy and say--

ME:  I don't recall having that conversation.

[is this a new sales technique praying on the bad recall of menopausal women with 20 year old windows?]

T:  Yes, we--

ME:  Look, my husband's in the business.  So, if we decide our windows need replacing, he would do the work himself.

T:  Well, that's great that your husband can install windows and I completely understand him not wanting to hire someone to do it then ...[should have ended there, but then he inhaled and went on]..... but he couldn't offer the warranty that we can by doing the work himself.

ME:  For a second the phone was silent on both ends.  I know what I was thinking [seriously dude? I should pay thousands of dollars in labor to YOU when my husband can install them for free.  And besides, I know where to find my husband if something doesn't work with the windows.  Can you give me THAT guarantee?]

T:  He said nothing while I was thinking.  Perhaps his brain was saying 'Seriously dude?  Did you just say that out loud? Maybe she's really dumb enough to fall for that line?  Yeah, I need to add this one to my top 10 sales pitches, because she hasn't hung up on me yet----

ME: -- Click--

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